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<blockquote data-quote="braus" data-source="post: 20438" data-attributes="member: 121">what's it like having any gf?Like having a retarded younger brother whom you deeply regret agreeing to room with. Sometimes he gives you a blowjob but it's bad and doesn't give you that &quot;O fuck that is so hot!!!&quot; that you used to feel like sex, it's like masturbation but with a mouth instead. Then he cries all the time for no reason, and a demon appears and gives you a bunch of colored dice and a paper bag. You put the dice in the bag and stir it all up and dump the dice out onto the table and see what gf you got. The dice all say something bad so you get at least as many bad traits as there are dice (there are several dice). If you ever try to talk about the bad traits and fix them she (your brother) cries again.I hear back in the day they used to cook, now they mostly cry if you don't airbnb them to a restaurant. But it's not out of love or anything. It's because their best friend told them that her boyfriend always takes her to restaurants and now she feels less special than her best friend, whom she hates intensely and is locked with in a lifelong struggle to one-up each other. Sometimes you walk in the room and she's doing something gross like she has hairy legs and gross clothes and you are surprised that you'd rather watch porn than get a blowjob from such a creature. Then she takes all your money eventually</blockquote>

[QUOTE="braus, post: 20438, member: 121"] what's it like having any gf? Like having a retarded younger brother whom you deeply regret agreeing to room with. Sometimes he gives you a blowjob but it's bad and doesn't give you that "O fuck that is so hot!!!" that you used to feel like sex, it's like masturbation but with a mouth instead. Then he cries all the time for no reason, and a demon appears and gives you a bunch of colored dice and a paper bag. You put the dice in the bag and stir it all up and dump the dice out onto the table and see what gf you got. The dice all say something bad so you get at least as many bad traits as there are dice (there are several dice). If you ever try to talk about the bad traits and fix them she (your brother) cries again. I hear back in the day they used to cook, now they mostly cry if you don't airbnb them to a restaurant. But it's not out of love or anything. It's because their best friend told them that her boyfriend always takes her to restaurants and now she feels less special than her best friend, whom she hates intensely and is locked with in a lifelong struggle to one-up each other. Sometimes you walk in the room and she's doing something gross like she has hairy legs and gross clothes and you are surprised that you'd rather watch porn than get a blowjob from such a creature. Then she takes all your money eventually [/QUOTE]

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