Why do you not want to help people that are suffering? Do you think they deserve it? Some kind of inverse morality that says some are born to be raped forever and you get to ignore or join in on the exploiting by giving up on the potential that could be made out of "nothing", you give up on the child's selfless joy that the leader of the band extends to all, because if you can't turn something into nothing what are you, you are a stagnant pond. You desire the almost perfect apprentice, the troubled master, its because you are not overflowing, yet, you are not able to create the excess that is added to the bare soil to grow the perfect flower, you cannot become the sun that shines down on the humble grass of the earth and makes them grow strong. You are nothing.